Daily Share 6.1
This sleep regression is gonna kill me, particularly if it lasts beyond these last two weeks of Nate's paternity leave. I think she woke me up five or six times last night? Is that even possible rn? I dunno. Just before bed I was thinking about brushing my hair, because it really needed it, and I decided not to because I was too tired. I could do it tomorrow or just throw it in a ponytail. I remembered later, laying in bed, that I used to be so admiring of my guitar teacher's wife's hair. It always looked so beautiful even though it was always tangled, and I was at a loss to figure out how she made it so effortless and gorgeous at the same time.
It was motherhood. She threw it up in a messy ponytail or clipped it, or tossed it around and held it back with her shades, and just rolled with it cuz she had two young twins and was too tired to mess with it. Now I'm doing the same thing, and I'm so self conscious about it. I had to laugh. She was just tired and motherly, and I thought (think!) it was perfect. The thought that a little teenage Marion might've admired my looks right now was hilarious and reassuring.
Nate let me take a huge nap, cuz he's amazing. I dreamt of iron wrought greenhouses and honeyed hardwood floors and furniture covered in greenery. Kneeling in the dirt and gathering fruit and veggies and mushrooms in my skirt. Family meals and shared afternoon tea, tomatoes bursting in my mouth, and warm sunlight on my skin and in my hair. I'm ready for growing season now. When is spring?